I was totally stunned (yes, I know how babies are made ;) that we were expecting again, JJ on the other hand, was not in denial about the way I had been acting (pregnancy makes me pretty nutso!) for the couple weeks that the handy New Zealand 'early response' tests came back negative. I usually "KNOW" I am pregnant pretty much immediately (like 48 hours later I am feeling insane and KNOW) but this time I wasn't really ready to accept it. You see, to paraphrase a nutcase small business owner (Don) from my childhood (I haven't lived in Indiana for so long now I had to check to see if he was still around, read some of his story here, it is actually pretty interesting!), I don't like being pregnant, I just looooove babies!!
I think this is the last baby I will be having. I always say I know I want more in the delivery room, as soon as the baby is born (and my body magically adjusts back to it's normal level of insanity :). I honestly believe that JJ would let me have a baby a year as long as it was healthy and safe for me to do so (for the record, JJ has never actually told me no or even really discouraged anything that I really wanted in the last 17 years, it's one of the ways he is the absolute, best husband in the world).
It appears that we will be in New Zealand for a second year (although our visa's will expire in six months and I don't believe JJ has a contract, yet). There always seems to be a certain level of uncertainty in these things until the lastish minute. Soo, AJ4 should be a kiwi.
What a whole new world this shall be!
They have babies with midwives here. I am totally open to this for other people (I really mean that) but I have had three easy, peasy pregnancies followed by three long, intense, complicated births.
AJ3 was the first baby to be born breathing -- We cried and said "He's breathing!" and poundman the OB looked at us like we had lost it! Please don't let me fool you though, AJ3 was not an easy birth, he was born occiput posterior (he was a sunny-side up baby). AJ1 took in meconium -- not the 10/10 on the Apgar I was hoping for :). I've written here before about AJ2's birthday. At some point during each of my deliveries, I have had an OB in my face yelling that they were taking me in for an emergency Cesarean. It hasn't happened yet but I am not one to temp fate.
In addition to all that, I'll be 35 when 4 comes. In the states that's high risk (here it's 38). This will be my fourth baby in five and a half years (my fave OB wanted me to wait at lease three years this time). Blah, blah, blah...my GP still wouldn't recommend me to public OB services, she thought I should still go midwife. We decided to go private.
Over the last month it has become apparent that it may be essential that I see an OB. I started having "episodes" a few weeks ago. I called JJ and calmly told him, I couldn't see well. I stopped working for a few hours and put my feet up but suddenly my ears were ringing and my head was pounding. I hoped it was a one off but it's happened a few times since. Last week, I had to go to the GP (who is still my preggo caregiver until the first of the year when I meet the magic threshold of being pregnant enough to warrant some form of specialized care) because I was sick with a virus and my BP 180/90 (I wasn't taxed or stressed or anything). So far, no protein found (thank God). I just want my usual pregnant blood pressure of 100/50 to kick in again BUUUT in the meantime, I am trying really hard to address whatever is up. It looks like specialized care will be a must this time around and probably a little more of a watchful eye at that.
I have another protein test that goes in the morning (Sunday mid-day in the states) so say a quick prayer for me and 4 (not to mention 1, 2 & 3 and JJ who would totally be impacted if I am thrown into hospital -- which the GP has told me is exactly what will happen the minute they find protein). I have full confidence that we will get through this and be just fine but I think that from this point forward it's time to concentrate on the babies I already have and are growing up too, too fast and on a healthy mamma so that I may be there with my four (who on earth or in heaven thought I could take care of this many babies) through all the stages of life (as a side note, if the AJs wait as long as we did to have babies, I will be almost the current retirement age before I'm a grandmamma!).
I am betting there is much, much more to share as this pregnancy progresses, it might not be interesting but I'll probably throw it out there for y'all to decide!
Happy Hanukkah!!
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